What I love about Jordan. And what I love less.
I’ve been living in Jordan for seven months now. Enough time to understand what’s wrong with this country and what isn’t.
Things I love:
It’s just a scratch
People don’t care so much about details. That can be helpful when you rent a car, give it back with a scratch and the rental service just doesn’t care.
People care for each other
When there is someone screaming in my neighbourhood (and that happens from time to time), people leave their houses to find out what’s going on – not because they are lurid, but because they want to help.
How can I help you?
Once I wanted to visit a friend who I had seen last time when I lived in Amman three years ago. After I understood that he doesn’t live any more where he used to live, I asked a neighbour whether he knew where to find that friend of mine. In the end that guy drove me around in the neighbourhood to find him. I can tell numerous stories like that.
Welcome to Jordan
If you are a foreigner from the west, you are treated nicely most of the time. People are usually interested in what you do and where you come from. And most of them really mean it. Once a guy invited me to his home for a tea, just because I climbed down the stairs in front of his nose. And you even have some privileges. When you want to get into a club or bar, it might be easier for you as a westerner as for some of the locals.
But … isn’t Jordan a dangerous place?
The crime rate we have in Amman every European capital can only dream of. Criminal offenses like robbery or theft happen to a much lesser extent here. I couldn’t have walked through Berlin (or used the public transportation) for seven months without ever being molested by a drunk or bored thug. In Amman, never anything like that happened to me.
Women
I really don’t know where to start … Expression. Temper. Even savagery. Huh …
Respect
I feel that old people, or handicapped people, are much more respected than e.g. in Germany. They are looked after, not only looked at.
Things I love less:
Lack of perfectionism
I am still trying to remember an examplary situation to illustrate what I mean. But believe me, it’s hard for a German.
Your business, my business
People are interested in what’s going on, but it is getting a bit too much sometimes. Given Amman’s two million citizens, it’s somewhat surprising and annoying that you cannot live here anonymously. Amman is a huge village. If you fart in your garden, the whole place talks about it the next day.
Rassism
If you come from another arab country, like Saudi Arabia or Syria, you might be treated as a third-class creature in Amman. Why? No idea. Maybe I was wrong when saying that seven months is enough to understand what’s going on.
Jordan is dangerous …
when it comes to certain jobs. This morning I witnessed some construction workers balancing on a piece of wood that was hanging down a building’s wall. They were fixing something 20 meters above the ground. No security ropes. No helmets. And no one who cares. Perhaps apart from the construction workers, but do they have a say?
The natural thing to do …
is not just throwing your litter somewhere, but letting it drop, no matter where you are (in the forest, on the highway, at the beach).
Fuck the environment! That would be an attitude. But here some people even don’t understand that there is something called environment. Some people simply don’t care about their surroundings. Some people simply don’t feel to be part of the town they live in – or they simply don’t feel that the town they live in is a place they can create and shape.
That cultural thing
Imagine a muslim guy who falls in love with a christian girl. That might work out till her parents find out. For traditional christian parents in Amman will never ever allow their daughter to marry a muslim guy. “What would the neighbours say?”
Yeah. These neighbours. They are always around, particularly when you stay at home most of the time.
Likewise, imagine a muslim girl falling in love with a christian guy (or, even worse, with a nonbeliever&arab&uneducated&poor&belonging-to-the-wrong-tribe-guy: “But don’t let him touch you!”
Same goes for muslim-muslim or christian-christian relationships, if your family has objections to the marriage. And don’t even think of having just a “relationship”. That could be considered to be unnatural.
Women are equal … equal to what?
Jordan is not as bad as Saudi Arabia, for example. In Jordan women are allowed to walk uncovered in the street and to drive a car. But is that all a woman needs – to lead the life she wants? Let’s ask them.
A family affair
“What do you do tonight?” “Umm, I think I’m gonna stay at home with my parents.”
In Jordan, culture is not lived in public. There are exceptions, but usually these exceptions are parties with fancy DJ’s from Europe or the U.S. There is hardly any locally rooted public culture. Take youth culture. What’s there in Jordan? Virtually nothing. And if there is something, it is imported from the west, and exclusively targeted at wealthy west Ammanis.
to be continued …
¡Qué interesante! Tienes mucha suerte de poder conocer desde dentro una cultura tan distinta a la nuestra. Así que te gustan las mujeres de allí… ¿te van los retos eh? porque no debe ser nada fácil como tu mismo dices ;). Gracias por compartir tus experiencias con nosotros, :**
interesting… i like the level of details you’ve mentioned.
anyway i did not know how much you hate me before now
just kidding
Oh! thanx danni.. you just reminds me to stay tonight with my parents also..
well, i’m thinking to stay with them as much as i could..
what do you “sink”?
My reply:
http://andfaraway.net/blog/2007/12/02/what-i-love-about-amman-and-what-i-love-less/
“There is hardly any locally rooted public culture. ”
That’s because you hang around the wrong people. you know, the western wannabee. Jordan is full of local culture. it’s not in german or english. it’s not advertised or promoted. it tends to be by word of mouth and you have to be a local. there are cultural center in Jordan that took years to discover by accident or by private invitation. and I am talking cultural center whose name never made it to the press either for political reasons or simply because they don’t want to attract people outside their mindset. some of these cultural centers can pack 500 people per event advertised only through private email lists and SMSs and phone trees. much of this secrecy and dislike for media attention comes from the years of the repressive martial laws.
i happen to be on a couple of them and it took forever to be invited.
jordan is made up of two worlds. an official world and an underground world. the official world is made up of things and people loyal to the regime. they get all the press and attention. and then you have everyone else. Jordanian leftists and islamists are very culturally active but have a nominal media footprint. their culturally activities are in Arabic only. they have their own publishing houses, cultural centers, schools, political gatherings. you just have to be invited. you can’t simply stumble across them.
be careful not to mix your personal experience with the real jordan. not possible to make generalizations based on our own personal experience. there is so much you don’t know about.
[…] a German friend and coworker, has a post that has the same exact title above, giving his impressions of what he thinks is “wrong” with this country and what […]
Looks like Germans and Americans have similar opinions of Jordan.
Concerning the “Your Business, My Business”, I’ve noticed how much people around here love to stare. There’s no such thing as a quick glance. They leer. Do I look green? Do I have antennae? Then what’s the attraction?
that is just a great post, nicely said
İ think you might actually have something here… im looking forward to part 2
Sehr interesant:)
Na ja, there are pro’s and con’s in every society. What I miss most about Germany is having public spaces where you just can hang out as much as you want. Ahhh, lying on the grass, reading a book and most importantly no one starring. Thats what I call luxury:D
@ Azmi
“That’s because you hang around the wrong people. you know, the western wannabee.”
I don’t think the people I hang around with try to be “western”. That would miss the point. However, I feel that a lot of the people I know try to find a way between the sometimes not so attractive traditional cultural life and a rather western lifestyle (parts of which might be admired and, at the same time, parts of which might be despised). They are exposed to western culture on the one hand, while living in a society that to a great extent clings to tradition, religion, and local customs. I can understand that this can get quite confusing (and believe me, in Germany the same confusion exists in times of globalisation, just to a lesser extent).
“much of this secrecy and dislike for media attention comes from the years of the repressive martial laws.”
Thanks for this insight. Sounds as if I miss a lot in Amman. Though it underlines my point: There is no local, PUBLIC culture. What’s there is hidden. What’s there is not in-, but exclusive. No public events that a significant number of people from different social or cultural backgrounds attend. There is not a lot of choice when it comes to theatre, cinema, opera, lectures, festivals, parades, demonstrations, concerts. This kind of choice and participation is what I miss here. And it shows the ruptures that cut this society in parts. But then, at least we have blogs.
@ Ohoud
“lying on the grass, reading a book and most importantly no one starring.” Talking about my home country, where were or are you in Germany where you cannot hang out as much as you want? Seriously, it’s the first time that I hear of that. I can only think of little places where I cannot lie in the grass, reading (”staring at you”, well, that really depends on what you look like; I guess having a very dark skin color might earn you lots of unwanted stares in certain parts of Germany). Though Germany is definitely not the best example of a highly dynamic public culture, compared to Spain, for example. Anyway, it is hard to compare Germany to Jordan – though I do it all the time.
By the way, it would be very refreshing to have more outside or inside views on Germany – maybe there is someone out there who reads this and has written about his experiences there.
I’m lost in translation:D Sie koennen auch auf Deutsch schreiben. I’m half German:)
“When you want to get into a club or bar, it might be easier for you as a westerner as for some of the locals.”
SO true. I take advantage of this most of the time, although it didn’t work 2 times. lol.
Du hast nicht gesagt das habn wir keine “ínordnung lassen” an die strassen in Amman! Fur mich ist das fuerchtbar.
Daniel,
Would like to comment on some areas of that post..
1.As said by azmi, your impressions are judgmental rather than being plain notes since you were sharing your likes and dislikes and not discussing aspects of life in Jordan. The problem that Jordan is designed and functioning for its people and slightly for visitors.
2.Regarding women equality, I would agree with you on the civil status laws which were constructed by Islam “Shari3a”.. being the only code regulated religiously (blood relations, passing nationality to kids from her foreign husband, inheritance shares, ..etc). As any change require maturity, I think its the Jordanian females that need to rise more as no law defies their potential favoring males.
3.Who looks down on saudis or syrians? thats not how arabs function! total isolated incidents in my opinion than a general practice..
4.Family bonds are tight and I understand that you may not like that.. but regarding across religion marriages, they are family countered due to religion factor more than “neighbor gossip” it applies for both muslims and christians in Jordan..
I totally agree on the professionalism part, its our main problem.
hi,
hab zufällig dein Blog gefunden.ich finde es wirklich interessant zu wissen, welche Eindrücke ein Deutscher von Amman hat.wie ich gelesen habe,hast du einiges sehr gut beobachtet und verstanden. Es ist nicht immer einfach solche Sachen in De zu erklären, da sich nicht viele was damit anfangen können, insbesondere die sozialen-kulturellen Aspekten.
ich komme aus Jordanien aber lebe seit fast 6 Jahren in DE.
ich bin gespannt was Teil 2 mit sich bringen wird!
Lg